Here is my next installment of the John Gottman Principle #2 Fondness and Admiration Challenge!
Week 4, Day 5:
- Thought: This marriage is a lot better than most I have seen.
- Task: Think of a marriage you know that’s awful.
- Response: I told my wife that I’ve seen a lot of marriages that are disasters in many areas and that I’m proud that ours is better and stronger than most despite having challenges and not always being able to say that throughout our history.
- Reaction: She said “Oh really, like whose marriage do you mean?” (I was actually trying to not call one out specifically.) I mentioned one aspect of one couple and another aspect of another couple, which she agreed with. Then we generalized about much of the brokenness we see in husbands and wives. We also named another couple whose marriage has failed completely and agreed that they are on a whole different level. This was actually a good exercise and one that made us realize how good we have it.